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America’s vocal scourge, Melisma Abuse, still a serious affliction, inauguration proves

Kelly Clarkson mauls anthem on the Mall.

Melisma Abuse (MA)—the tragic syndrome afflicting American pop singers—has not yet come close to being eradicated, as the performances of Kelly Clarkson and (to a lesser degree) Beyoncé Knowles at today’s inauguration of President Barack Obama proved. The affliction—also known as Urban Yodeling Syndrome (UYS)—is the indulgent practice of fitting somewhere between 3 and 18 […]

BREAKING: Kelly Clarkson engaged to be married

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Kelly Clarkson has announced her wedding engagement via Twitter. I’M ENGAGED!!!!! I wanted y’all to know!! Happiest night of my life last night! I am so lucky and am with the greatest man ever — Kelly Clarkson (@kelly_clarkson) December 15, 2012   The ‘Since You’ve Been Gone’ singer has announced she will wed 35-year-old talent […]

“Kelly Clarkson” leaves Carrie Underwood in the dust

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American Idol‘s Kelly Clarkson makes history today, July 4, as the latest sales figures from Nielsen SoundScan confirm her current hit, “Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You),” to be the best-selling Idol single of all time, surpassing the long-time champion, Carrie Underwood’s “Before He Cheats.” Wha, wha. Carrie Underwood is still the better performer, no matter […]

Kelly Clarkson Nails National Anthem at The Super Bowl XLVI [HD VIDEO]

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The first American Idol sang the almost impossible-to-pull-off National Anthem without a hitch. In fact, it was downright perfect. Kelly is no Steven “Dude Looks Like A Lady” Tyler, that’s for damn sure! Good on ya, Ms. Clarkson!

Kelly Clarkson says “I love Ron Paul”

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Yeah, he’s a racist and yeah he hates “queers” and sure, he’s 141 years young, and oh yes, he’s not so crazy about the Jews. But let’s not nitpick! Kelly Clarkson’s life, for one, would suck without him. Who’s the man? Presidential hopeful Ron Paul, of course! “I love Ron Paul… I liked him a […]

The Biebs on “The American Music Awards” This Nov. 20 on ABC

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THAT “woman” — Mariah Yeater — who claimed to have had a child with Justin Bieber still wants him to take a paternity test, even though she dropped the lawsuit because she knows she’s full of shit her lawyers told her so — won’t rain on Justin Bieber’s parade. The Biebs is set to perform […]

Kelly Clarkson to Return to “American Idol”

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Kelly Clarkson — who shot to fame after winning the inaugural season of the television series American Idol — will return to her roots this Thursday April 14, along with Jason Aldean (whom she duets with on the hit, “Don’t You Wanna Stay”) and Rihanna. Although Clarkson is a mere 28, she recently performed a […]

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